Thursday, January 21, 2016

Valley of the Shadow of Death

I am praying for a friend right now who posted on Facebook recently he is "deep in the valley of the shadow of death." He is going through a time in which I am all too familiar and my heart breaks for him. I find myself on the other side of the table in these conversations now and it is difficult. Oh, how I wish I could do or say the right thing. I wish I could help in some way. The only thing I know to do is pray and just be a friend. 

There are other reasons it is difficult. It is difficult because I still feel my battle is being waged in my heart - like I am incomplete. Most of that is my fault. You see, I didn't handle all of this quite right. I didn't put ALL of my trust in God when my marriage fell to dust. My faith was shaken to the core and I can see that now. I depended on myself too much and Jesus too little. It would have always been a rocky path, but it could have been one with less heartache. I have spent too much time in the last five years worried about my plans, rather than waiting for what God has planned for me. I've been worried about how I will work things out. Worried about life in general. I've spent too much time worrying to realize God has this under control and I need to lean on Him. 

Sixpence None the Richer released a song (a long time ago) called Trust, which was taken from Proverbs 3:5. It has always spoken to me and I hope it speaks to you, too.


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